About Daddy Jim

I am Greek-Italian, with some Turk and North African thrown in for good measure, 54, 5’10” 162, 31″W; 43″C; 16″A. I am a former leatherboy. I am a native of Brooklyn NYC, but have relocated and now live in Wilton Manors, South Florida. I do get to NYC on occasion. I workout at ISLAND CITY GYM in South Florida anywhere from 3 to 5 times per week. I am both pierced <12 Gauge Lorum> and inked, consisting of 3 Far Eastern symbols representing COURAGE, WISDOM, STRENGTH; along with 12 stars representing principles of Buddhism and a comet encompassing my shoulder and down my back. MY new addition is 41 stars on my right arm to my shoulder representing my friends who died from HIV disease and the other two stars represent my parents. The last addition represents the very symbol of Buddhism; namely, the Wheel of Life which is located on my upper back in the center between my shoulders. I am also a student of Tibetan Buddhism and am learning much from my journey, not only in life but in the studies I am presently undertaking. I live a very healthful lifestyle and I seek the same from my friends or leatherfolk in my life!

I enjoy having a good time. I prefer not to have a severe look. I take pleasure in pleasure; having a good laugh (even at my own expense) and don’t take anything in life too seriously for it all passes by! I guess the boy in me is still alive and well. I glorify and love that time in my life because I learned so much and had so much fun. I will go further to say that the BEST parts of me are THAT boy and I work at never losing that no matter how I old I am blessed to become. Much of what existed then is all but gone and I am not sure things are better; just very different! I dont accept what I see or even like it very much. A part of me remains a leatherboy and I feel that the mischieviousness, playfulness, Tazmanian devilishness and comical parts of me are still that boy which remains alive and well! I have learned over the years, through very difficult and challenging experiences, to roll with the punches; to communicate effectively and to respect anyone who comes into my life. I try DAMN hard not to judge any ONE person specifically, for I have no right to do so. I prefer to focus in on who I am with, giving him my personal best for the time I am there. One other VERY important point I need to interject here is that I do NOT consider myself a MASTER. That word, MASTER, is often more misused and abused than any boy I have ever known. In reality, there are VERY few Masters. If you need to know what a MASTER is, go to your dictionary and look up its meaning. If the man you know does NOT evoke MOST of those qualities contained in that meaning than he likely is NOT a Master. The title MASTER, is usually *GIVEN* to those leathermen who are RECOGNIZED as such by their peers and contemporaries, NOT a self inflicted title by someone who has an overinflated ego. I often call them, legends in their own minds! Unfortunately there are many of them running around doing a significant amount of damage to guys who dont know the difference.

I have learned over the years to cherish my friendships and my manboys deeply, whether in or out of leather, for I have learned something, either positive or negative, from each one of them. Even a negative experience doesnt necessary leave one scarred. It all depends on what you CHOOSE to take from it. As long as you have learned what you need not do again, then the experience, although negative, produced a positive effect, evolving you into a better person because of it. Through struggle and risk taking there is growth, always! I recently heard a saying that I have adopted for myself. One must climb out on a limb for thats where the fruit usually IS.

Being in the leather community for over 30 years I have discovered one truth among many; the GREATNESS of being a boy is his surrender to the SIR he cares for; the GREATNESS of a SIR is the caring and love he gives to the boy who serves him WELL!! It would appear (for the most part), THAT belief doesnt exist any longer either. It’s all about the mechanics of sex and getting off and this goes for both SIRS AND boys because neither one are willing to commit to anything more than an hour or a weekend because all you have to do is go on the net and find your next one hour (or weekend) fling. Many more options to find what you want; yes, but more bonding relationships; NO. Easier yes but better? Easier is NOT necessarily better.

INTERESTS

The only real way to know anyone is to spend real life time together, getting to know who the person is over a PERIOD of time, not 48 hours, and then decide for yourself if he is indeed the kind of guy you wish to know. Leathermen DO DATE. You can also email, which is not as good as real time but if you live half way around the world or the USA its better than nothing, but remember that is IS limited. I dont believe in cyber ANYTHING or phone anything. Cyberboy, cyberMaster, cyberslave, cyber this, cyber that. IT amounts to getting off; PERIOD. Even in reading my words on this site, is still limited. I have found that the internet; chat groups, chat rooms do have their place; as initial contacts, but for anything of substance to develop, nothing short of real time face to face works over the long haul! You can truly never know who you are with until you spend time with that individual. I know quite a few guys who initiated a relationship on line then decided to move half way across the USA lock, stock n barrel. A few weeks later this hot affair was over and it always ended up that the boy needed to get out and find his own place.

Personally, I am in charge within the bedroom and guiding outside of the bedroom. I dont wish to control every move or action the boy makes, but I do enjoy guiding him. A slave however, DOES have all of his actions and moves controlled. I actually enjoy a spirited and feisty boy ( I should know because I WAS one). Not only does it keep life interesting, it gives me the opportunity to mold him to fit the things I need from him, yet keep his interest in me and his spirit alive and positive! I enjoy working with the uniqueness of each boy. That raw talent should be honored and refined, not destroyed. When you destroy that, you destroy the essence of the boy who is coming to you, and then, why even bother. He is no longer what you found attractive in the first place! How many so called leathermen find someone then they do everything to change who the boy is. Why would anyone do that? just go find someone else rahter than playing headgames on a guy who you dont like AS he is.

Any boy with me can expect a variety of service; however the mechanics of service (or sex) is not nearly as important as the bond that develops between us, OVER TIME. I will expand his limits and open him up to new experiences. To put it simply are the these words: I lead and guide and you follow me.

The realities of life are more than just reading and acting out the fantasies of a hot story in a leather magazine. Any boy who is collared, can be expected to do for me in many ways ranging from cooking to occasionally wearing what I want him to wear and keeping me informed when he goes out with friends; where he goes and what he’s doing (he is allowed to have a life, a job and friends but I am to know his whereabouts). When we go out, either separately, together, or when he is working, he will wear some sort of token article, such as a collar or restraint to remind him that he belongs to me. He does NOT turn over his paycheck to me (if we live together then the bills are split 50/50); he does NOT have to be my maid; I can pay for one. He does NOT perform sexually for anyone, PERIOD. There are no group sex parties of ANY kind, sex orgies or bathhouses. There are too many sexually transmitted diseases and too many men out there who dont give a damn about what disease, parasite, virus or bacteria they pass on to you as long as they get off, and to me, this is NOT what its all about and its certainly not what the leather community is to me. If the boy has needs other than being with me then these issues must be discussed at length before he is EVER given a collar. Since I have only collared 6 boys in over 20 years I do not hand out collars as souveniers; nor will you ever get one after spending ONE weekend with me because you were hot sex. IF you want a souvenier go to the Empire State Building and buy one!! What I have just described to you is called a relationship; NOT a weekend trick where you play act by giving a collar to a total stranger. Thats ignorant and there are ALOT of ignorant men out there.

MOST importantly, is love, respect and devotion. The love and respect you have for the man who serves you well will take you far provided you both communicate to each other effectively and frequently.

26 thoughts on “About Daddy Jim

  1. peter quesnel says:

    Jim, I’m very pleased I came across you on Facebook now. What I’ve read so far strikes a deep cord in me. We have many of the same thoughts when it comes to relationships. I’m not saying we’re compatible or that we’ll be anything but pen pals but just that we are similar in that I too am not looking for easy sex but a committed relationship with a Man (its capitalized for obvious reasons), who knows what he wants and can respect his boy for who and what he is.
    Nice meeting you Jim.

    • hotsir says:

      Thank you…..Sorry it has taken so long but I am not very computer literate and only now getting the hang of this site…if there anything I can ever do please dont hesitate to ask….

  2. Brooks says:

    Hi Daddy Jim! It was great getting to know you a bit last night at the Eagle. Had a great time with you both. Looking forward to visiting with you again.
    –boy brooks

  3. Russ says:

    Hello Sir..I am so glad that i have found you here..Thank you…
    russ

  4. B Lee says:

    I want to thank you again for helping me out, Sir, and giving me the drive to get moving again.

    -B

  5. Sir Chuck says:

    Hello, Sir!
    Excellent writing! I’m taking on a new Boy, so was very inspired by your thoughts and views!

    Sir Chuck

    • hotsir says:

      Thank you for commenting on my page Sir Chuck….you can also go to my entire leather history which is on an audio file so no need to read.
      The copy on here is also on file at the Leather Archives and Museum in Chicago. A very special dog-boy did the interview which lasts two hours.
      Again, thank you and if I can ever be of service or assistance please dont hesitate to ask.

  6. Tommy says:

    Hello Sir,
    I’m currently under contract to my Master but it expires the first of September. We started to renegotiate, but unfortunately Master is interested in a longer term relationship and this being my first contract, I find I like this more that I expected and am interested in serving other Masters/Doms Sir. I admit I’ve been sucked into the hope I can meet a Master that clicks enough that we could maybe fall in love — and the fantasy of that is enough that I want more experience of the lifestyle. The problem is that here in Houston and I’m afraid everywhere the culture and community is gone. That depresses me. Sir, you sound thoughtful and both old enough to have experienced the old guard culture yet young enough to have passion for the lifestyle. Also Sir, I will be 55 next month so we may have a similar life experience and outlook. At the very least, if it pleases you Sir, I think I could learn from your experiences and thoughts. If not, I’ve enjoyed reading your blog Sir. Thank you Sir; slave Tommy.

  7. Tommy says:

    I can’t believe you Live in Wilton Manors! I just moved to Pa from WM in Oct 2013. I missed an opportunity. Please look for me on FB “Tommy yourboy” Thanks you!!!

  8. RC says:

    Hello, I have what I feel is a stupid question, a question I should know the answer to but I don’t. I am 48 and often men will say to me “hello Sir” or “Hi Sir”. The guys are attractive I would like to converse with them but when I say for example “hey man, how are you?” I get dead silence. Thanks in advance for any advice.

    • hotsir says:

      From the short post you wrote, it appears these guys are seeking a SIR (daddy) type of guy and you must be fitting that image for them. The “hey man how are you” line isnt what they want to hear from you. Rather than use a line like that, you can ask them why are you calling me SIR? Find out what they see or what their expectations are.

  9. Pascal Scott says:

    I’m an old-school Leatherdyke, educated by my Leathermen friends in San Francisco in the 1970s-1990s. I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciated finding your blog and reading your philosophy. Like you, I am dismayed by the changes I’ve seen in the Leather community, which for women now is no longer lesbian but “pansexual.” I mourn the loss of the values I remember from Leather as it used to be. It was heartening to read your thoughts.

    • hotsir says:

      I am frpm your time period..If you would like to go down memory lane. Click on the link to the left where it says “my leather history”. IT is an audiofile of my experiences during that time period. YOu dont have to even read anything..just sit back and listen..

  10. Will says:

    Since you have experience in the community I was curious if you knew of any sirs/masters in the Ohio area that you know as being the real deal or trust. I would like to be a long time committed boy.

  11. G says:

    Good morning Sir,
    I have been serving my Sir/Master now for 3 years, We had built up a good relationship, trust respect etc. yesterday we had arranged to have a training session, when i got there, He had arranged for another “Master” to join us. i know He did this for me as i had told Him it was one of my fantasies. The session started okay but as it went on the other Master started to inflict more and more pain, i honestly did try to comply with what He wanted but in the end i said Our/our safe word. my Sir told the other that i had reached my limits but the other sir just kept going. my problem is that my Sir allowed him to continue telling me that He was being paid for my services and that as His property i had no rights what soever. i have been left very sore and very bruised especially around the genitals and bleeding from the anus. Which in my situation is very hard to conceal.
    my dilemma is that i feel as if my Sir has let me down and has crushed all the trust that i had in him. i have to admit that i do love my Sir but that he has destroyed that just to make some money. Do i have the right to leave him even though We/we have signed a Master/slave contract? Plus i know that i do belong to Him and i in my mind i always will, but i am unsure if i can rebuild the trust and respect i had for him but doubt if i could find anyone else that understands me and my situation.
    Daddy Jim Your advice would be welcome and i thank You in advance for taking Your time to read.
    Thank You
    slave g
    517-546-443

    • Daddy Jim says:

      If he did not respect your safe word then he violated his own agreement since a safe word was in place. Since he was in violation and trust was destroyed you can indeed leave

  12. g says:

    Thanks Daddy Jim, Sir, the Master and i have since parted ways, i could not re-build the trust/respect that i believed was needed for the relationship to continue. Difficult decision and i have been through some very black times but starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. g

    • Daddy Jim says:

      You must always feel safe. Without safety the contract is null and void as is the relationship! I wish you all good things boy and a good boy like yourself will find someone deserving of your service. As a former boy, one must stand up for himself!

      • g says:

        Thank You Sir, Daddy Jim, i am afraid that You have more confidence in this unworthy boy than the boy has i doubt if i will find anyone else to serve, still feel very guilty that i have let my former Master down, He is the one that i disobeyed and i have to live with that. slave g

  13. Matt says:

    After finishing listening to your audio history I’m fascinated by your life! You have truly lived and been a real part of something. I only hope I am able to discover a community/family to be a part of as
    well. I just wanted to post this to show appreciation. -Matt

  14. John says:

    Thank you Daddy Jim for your background story. It really touches my heart and I know I can learn from your experience. As a new boy I have a lot to learn and experience in this new culture that I have joined.

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